Jam Chooses Death! The letter of resignation

Hello all.This is my "quit" letter.In this letter,I will tell you all secrets,opinions,reasons I'm going leave, and what I like to call the "who" if you can find out what it is.
For those of you who don't give a crap about the life of jam, skip down to the "Why I am Leaving" part.
What is a jam?

Being Jam is hard.
For those of you who didn't know that I was leaving,I've been teasing this since June. The "October To-Do list" post that I posted last month was a sign that I was going to be leaving this month,because I had so much to do that wasn't being done with great effort because of my time with the server.And my original saying was that if I had so much to do that I didn't have time to get on the server,I would quit.I can't water all the flowers in my garden can I? No.I won't fool myself to believe I can anymore. That's why the word sacrifice exists.

1 month ago,when I went to take a district test that tested memorization on 8 subjects in a big ole' binder. I was so pissed that I knew that I didn't do good in some areas of the 8 tests.The entire time I was taking the test, I kept saying to myself "why bother testing someone's 'intelligence' if they don't have to use their brains at all - they just stash in a bunch of trivial facts in there,there is no thinking going on.Even the president would fall asleep trying to read one page in that big binder".I shed a tear, the first one I've had in years, when my friend who renounces him self as a "fact teller" told me "scores of 400/1000 are very common in everyone in at least 3 subjects that are all about memorization,even for me".That's not me. I am the "overachiever". If they wanna play the game,I'll play and remember everything in the book. And that isn't an arrogant thing or anything,I'm way past the whole "i am better than everyone!" thing. Next week is the big test.I haven't had time to prepare because of by bitchy-inspiring teacher filling up my binder with work and also 2 novels I am writing for a competition,but these 3 days that I have off with only a packet of homework,I will use it to prepare and it's going to take extreme focus.

My friends are so surprised about how I went to have a grand canyon full of time to take a nap,to having absolutely no time to even check a clock.A friend even called me a workaholic.saying I shouldn't stress myself.I responded with "there's no reason to wait for life to kick you in the ass if you have the chance to prepare early by drugging yourself with many(7 for me) extracurricular activities and still make straight A's in all classes. Of course, I don't consider myself smart,because my first AP teacher quickly taught me that students are bullshitted and lied to by the sympathetic pity from teachers until they experience failure when they reach an AP class. The only way I learn is by failure,and I did.Many things have I learned from this server and even outside of it.What making a right decision feels like,and why it needs to be made. How to balance both sides of the scale,and what it feels like to hold onto it.That skill alone is hard to get because many people are not willing to venture through the nightmare of a failure- instead they ignore what they call a bad path.One great example is the usual dumb ass that is still passed onto the next grade even after they tear up all their homework,explored the classroom, and straight up give the bird to their teacher A server example is when a staff member who didn't want to get involved with the situation with cory long ago,he would've been a great help.And finally the last lesson,what Time really is.

I go through all these activities to teach me how to become a better person.Leadership,confidence,Creativity,multi-tasking,analyzation,improvisational skills,law ethic,True fairness,teamwork,etc;They are all skills I am building to become a better person.
If anyone is interested,this is the 3rd of the 3 songs that I have played with my marching band group for the past 3 months every Thursday.
listeninglab.stantons.com/title/tonight-west-side-story/254400/?s=1

Why I am leaving:
Basically to get on with life.I have fulfilled what I wanted from my original reason to be a mod : because the server needed me. The server was really corrupted with rdm back in the day,especially in the night.It was so bad it made me from a clumsy staff member to a corrupted pseudo-mastermind.I abused my power and banned anyone who rdmd that I assumed was a troll.My favorite quote from my "corrupted" self was "they don't deserve my mercy".Now I can control my power better thanks to amf. Now,the rdm has been suppressed with the help of the people I've trained.I have also banned the major faults of the server (Cory,bohjo,etc).Hopefully you all will teach those who are below you as you get promoted.


Meaningful quotes:

Big legs: what goes around comes around Motherfucker.

Amf:Fuck you

Pooki herm: Lol, I'm going to get off. You're biased as fuck.

The Theivius racoonus: why?

DaddyBenDover:That's your fault buu-buu.

Organization: I don't care what you believe jam

Bohjo: are you opening up to the troll of the server?

Gho:YES.BEING A MOD IS OVERWHELMING.

Smoke:Dude,you are literally the most favorite person I've ever met. You're cunning,demented, and backstabbing.You gave him a piece of his own shit,and got him mad and banned!

Bohjo: you are far too nice
LikeAsumboode:That sneaky bastard.
Waste: Sorry I betrayed you,Jam.
Jam In The Jukebox: KKK,just don't blame it on me or that'll be what you call "being a pansy" Bohjo: oh no,you lost respect today,so like the others you will pay.

Jam In The Jukebox: You're a troll Bohjo. Embrace it or change
Amf: Read the rules Jam
CoryInYourClan: I've had enough of your bullshit.
Mordecai(Freddy Fazbear): WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT. Jam In The Jukebox: For the good of the server.

Mordecai(Freddy Fazbear): I don't know why I am crying.Fuck Jam In the Jukebox: Why are you upset? You should be proud.
Jam In The Jukebox: everyone is dumb in my book
Jam In The Jukebox: I'd rather not ruin your day
Jam In The Jukebox: I like my enemies and friends
Bohjo: lets not dwell in the past.lets start anew without lies.I dont want to erase.I just want you to trust me.
Lord vermillion Morty: I'm curious.If you were keeping it a secret, why did you tell me that you were resigning? Jam In The Jukebox: Because you're not an ass or a hard head or I have at least seen you online at the same time as I was.And some people have been knowing since June.

Bohjo: did you ever think that maybe bohjo isn't even a real person but a computer set up as an experiment Jam In The Jukebox: Humans are not smarter than inanimate objects.So you are human | Bohjo: oooh and the point goes to jam.
Waste:Do you trust me?
Aiden Dolphin: What have I done wrong?
Bohjo: Haha. single life
Bohjo: but secretly you do care
Waste:Thanks for keeping an aye on that kind of thing.
Waste:Fuck old me
Kenny: STOP IT YOU FUCKER.STOP FUCKING WITH MY MIND
Amf: If you think being a mod is all about slaying, then your a bad mod. Being a staff member is about making people happy.
Bohjo: and here lies the truth of jam. stuck in the disbelief of others

Jam In the Jukebox: Because I trust you. The Rev | Hydro: Thanks
Jam In the Jukebox: Are we still friends? Everyone: Always buddy.

My last requests to this server is to:

Demote me(If you want.I don't know when I'll ever get on Gmod again.I just don't feel dedicated enough to what I have to accomplish in the real world knowing I have a server that I need to protect because I have that rank.)
Protect the server for backstab and everyone.
Never forget what it means to be a staff member.That rank a symbolizes the power of law and what it means to have feelings.